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Farmers use controlled fires to burn grass at the end of a season to prepare for the next season. Construction experts use dynamite in a controlled environment to demolish buildings to start over. Each is done to destroy what isn’t needed but in such a way that there aren’t any unintended casualties.
Emotions can be dealt with in the same way.
It’s no secret that holding in your emotions isn’t good for you. It increases stress hormones, like cortisol, that can make you physically ill. We are talking weight gain, chronic pain, stomach issues… all kinds of fun stuff. That all being said, it’s not a good look to walk around constantly expressing emotions without regard for time, place, or responsibilities. Toddlers do that. You’re not a toddler.
So, what do we do then? Controlled explosions.
Give yourself 5, 10, 15, even 30 minutes to completely immerse yourself in your emotions in a safe environment. Everyday if you have to! Lock yourself in your bathroom, your car, whatever is accessible to you and let it all out. Cry, scream, hit a pillow, whatever you need to do to let it out completely. Now, it’s time to put your big girl/guy pants on and get back to life as it stands today. Your negative emotions don’t define you, nor are they a badge of honor.
We all experience unpleasant emotions. Name them. Feel them. Get on with your day.