One of the top five most common questions I’ve gotten from clients over the years is “How can I become more confident”?
For the longest time I had no idea how to answer it and would use stereotypical therapist responses to turn the question back to the client and work it out. Not a bad thing, but the fact remained that I didn’t have an answer.
One day I had a long supervision session with my mentor and we talked about this at length. She was a phenomenal counselor and knew how to inspire people, something I strive to do every day. What she said stuck with me all these years later.
The best way to build self-esteem is to take risks.
Try something new. Do something that scares you. Try something you may fail doing. If you fail, you learn from it and grow. If you succeed, you strengthen.
How right was she? Every time I’ve taken calculated risks, there’s been a payoff. Win, lose, or draw, there’s growth. (Calculated as in not jumping in front of traffic or taking up drug use or anything. Risks with a payoff!)
So anytime you start to get very comfortable, bored, or scared, take a leap. Talk to someone you normally wouldn’t. Wear an outfit outside your comfort zone. Rock a bold lip. Take a class you’re intimidated by. Leap with both feet and take in that payoff.